Today was a great day. I sat under a tree on a blankie next to a sleeping Spencer and just watched bluejays and cardinals and orioles zip past me and bounce around in the trees. I watched a little kid get pulled around by a giant dog and a group of little kids gather round their dad as he gutted a giant fish. I read some scriptures. I sat and reminded myself of beautiful moments when I've come to know that God lives. I snuggled next to Spencer and listened to John Rutter. I had a moment where I felt overwhelming sadness at loves lost. And I felt overwhelming gratitude for the love that I have. I sat and thought about children I don't have, and tried to imagine children I would have. I wondered if they would be blond or red-headed. It seems like almost everyone in my family, except for Jack and I, were born with blond hair. But I couldn't imagine anything but dark hair because I spent Sunday holding a dark-haired little baby girl. Spencer bought me a peace lily. I watched him skip rocks. I took a luxurious nap. I got up at 5 am. And I'm going to go and buy a piano tomorrow after our early morning show.
Today was a great day. Filled with little generosities and specific moments that are too generic to articulate, but all the same--I felt the gamut of emotions from loneliness to overwhelming love.
I loved being in this day. And even as I was in it, I imagined that one day I would look back at today and be happy that I had lived in this day.
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Choir and other random events
My calling in the church right now is as the ward choir president. This means that I get to go to all the choir rehearsals and occassionally, I'll send out a reminder email about the upcoming practices.
Our choir director is an angel. She is brilliant. And so we sound brilliant. We sang in church today and it was divine. I wish I could play for you the song. And tonight we practiced this Moses Hogan arrangement of the spiritual "Stand by Me". It was too delicious for words.
In other news, I've lost 25 pounds--or I had until I got all bloated today and gained 6 pounds! Stupid period!! But it will all go away in a few days. I feel better. Except for the fact that I'm having a period after only 3 weeks. I usually go 2 to 3 months in between periods. This is a new twist! I guess the weight loss is changing my body.
And in other news, Spencer and I are running a kids acting workshop this summer with a woman who teaches English workshops. She is linked in with Alexandria schools and she's wonderful! She's renting us a nice space to work and we'll put together 4 sessions. If it succeeds, it should lead to private lessons and possibly a studio, but this is all in the future. Either way, things are looking up jobwise.
Another exciting event--Spencer has been given free range access to a beachhouse in North Carolina for the fall. This means that I get to spend at least a week on the beach in September! Whoopeee!!!
Our choir director is an angel. She is brilliant. And so we sound brilliant. We sang in church today and it was divine. I wish I could play for you the song. And tonight we practiced this Moses Hogan arrangement of the spiritual "Stand by Me". It was too delicious for words.
In other news, I've lost 25 pounds--or I had until I got all bloated today and gained 6 pounds! Stupid period!! But it will all go away in a few days. I feel better. Except for the fact that I'm having a period after only 3 weeks. I usually go 2 to 3 months in between periods. This is a new twist! I guess the weight loss is changing my body.
And in other news, Spencer and I are running a kids acting workshop this summer with a woman who teaches English workshops. She is linked in with Alexandria schools and she's wonderful! She's renting us a nice space to work and we'll put together 4 sessions. If it succeeds, it should lead to private lessons and possibly a studio, but this is all in the future. Either way, things are looking up jobwise.
Another exciting event--Spencer has been given free range access to a beachhouse in North Carolina for the fall. This means that I get to spend at least a week on the beach in September! Whoopeee!!!
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Today is a day. A wonderful day.
It started off with a conversation with a friend on the phone. Then I put on an old tee shirt and a linen skirt, hiked it up and laid out on the deck while reading the plays with Queen Margaret's character.
After falling asleep in the sun, I moved myself inside and continued to read inside (sleep). I slept on the living room floor until 3:30pm.
And now I am looking at the list of things I need to get done before next week, and all I want to do is sleep. We are starting a new residency in Maryland next week, which means I have to be in Maryland Monday morning at 6am. I'm still directing the after school program production at Cabin John, so I have to run over there after teaching at this other school. Then I have to run to my class in Falls Church and teach my Ethics class until 10:30pm.
This schedule continues throughout the week. It's exciting! And I love it so much! (Really--this isn't sarcasm!) I just need to go grocery shopping and cook some meals and make sandwiches, and prepare myself adequately. But all i want to do is sleep!
I'm not sick. I'm not depressed. I feel really good! Just tired.
Spencer pointed out yesterday as we crossed paths that it has been 3 days since we hung out. The only consolation is that he looks horrible and he misses me too.
I think he has much to do with my low-energy. The man is like a drug!! He has a friend in from out of town, and I think it's important to prove that I can live without him, since we're just friends.
Well, I'm finding it difficult. I realize that someday we're both going to get married and this friendship is going to take a backburner to those relationships, and so I'm trying to remind myself of the great life I have without him. And I do!
I am officially a pathetic loser. I miss my friend.
Done. I admit. I prefer my life when he's around. Done.
It started off with a conversation with a friend on the phone. Then I put on an old tee shirt and a linen skirt, hiked it up and laid out on the deck while reading the plays with Queen Margaret's character.
After falling asleep in the sun, I moved myself inside and continued to read inside (sleep). I slept on the living room floor until 3:30pm.
And now I am looking at the list of things I need to get done before next week, and all I want to do is sleep. We are starting a new residency in Maryland next week, which means I have to be in Maryland Monday morning at 6am. I'm still directing the after school program production at Cabin John, so I have to run over there after teaching at this other school. Then I have to run to my class in Falls Church and teach my Ethics class until 10:30pm.
This schedule continues throughout the week. It's exciting! And I love it so much! (Really--this isn't sarcasm!) I just need to go grocery shopping and cook some meals and make sandwiches, and prepare myself adequately. But all i want to do is sleep!
I'm not sick. I'm not depressed. I feel really good! Just tired.
Spencer pointed out yesterday as we crossed paths that it has been 3 days since we hung out. The only consolation is that he looks horrible and he misses me too.
I think he has much to do with my low-energy. The man is like a drug!! He has a friend in from out of town, and I think it's important to prove that I can live without him, since we're just friends.
Well, I'm finding it difficult. I realize that someday we're both going to get married and this friendship is going to take a backburner to those relationships, and so I'm trying to remind myself of the great life I have without him. And I do!
I am officially a pathetic loser. I miss my friend.
Done. I admit. I prefer my life when he's around. Done.
Made of Poo
Worst. movie. ever.
I went to see Made of Honor tonight because I happen to be 1) a girl and 2) fond of My Best Friend's Wedding.
Now, I grant you we walked in 10 minutes late, but I felt like vomiting throughout the entire movie. I won't give away any of the plot--it's hard to give away something that doesn't exist--but I will tell you this: the entire crux of the movie rests in a scene between Patrick Dempsey and a dog.
Nuff said.
Save some money and stay away. Far. Far. Away.
I went to see Made of Honor tonight because I happen to be 1) a girl and 2) fond of My Best Friend's Wedding.
Now, I grant you we walked in 10 minutes late, but I felt like vomiting throughout the entire movie. I won't give away any of the plot--it's hard to give away something that doesn't exist--but I will tell you this: the entire crux of the movie rests in a scene between Patrick Dempsey and a dog.
Nuff said.
Save some money and stay away. Far. Far. Away.
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