Tuesday, April 29, 2008

My desires!

I get to play Queen Margaret in Queen Margaret.

This isn't that big of a deal, since it's only a staged reading and we only have 1 performance--but it's still a title character. And it's still a GREAT part.

I'm so excited to sink my teeth into it!!!

I wish I could figure out where my life was going. I enjoy teaching. I enjoy performing, but I feel completely stretched and my car is about ready to fall apart.

It's going to take a bit of a miracle to help put me on a solid path. I need something concrete right now. I think my priority right now is finding a full-time job with benefits. I love acting--but I need a constant right now. And acting does not provide that at this moment in time.

I keep going back and forth between jumping off and really going for acting, and wanting to pay the bills. The thing is, I'm happiest acting--but it's just so fickle! I don't know what I'll end up doing. Spencer was talking about running a theatre workshop this summer for kids. He's got everything set up and we would partner on it and split the proceeds. That would work out great, but then what? I could continue teaching at the university, which is fine--but eventually I'm going to want to teach acting.

Good things are happening. I am continually rehired to teach as an adjunct at Stratford, and that's a blessing. I get to work as an actor continually. And opportunities continue to arise, but it's just a little scary, and I would like to feel like I'm using my resources well. I want to stop driving everywhere. I want to live somewhere where I can teach, act, and walk everywhere. This might be a pie in the sky dream, but it's my dream! And I want to be able to have health insurance that i don't have to pay for out of pocket!

It's the little things that make me the happiest.

These are the desires of my heart.

And finding love and having babies would all be great too!


Hannah S said...

Gosh, I know what you mean! Being the wife of an eternal student gets me dreaming often. That security is so necessary though...I hope something comes your way soon!

Eve said...

Thanks! By the by, I loved reading your latest blog. So good!