Monday, May 27, 2013

One Eternal Round

It's hard to to write a gratitude blog on a day that feels so perfect.

I just want to document every little detail in some boring "Dear Diary" style...

But really, I just want to enjoy the music, feel the breeze, look out at the pond, and smile in this moment.

I'm happy.

Gratitude is a funny thing.

It has this power to turn a hard moment into a gift.

Gratitude is the beginning of grace.

I thought about this today sitting in church.

I wondered if I could take being shot in the gun with a big bullet and turn that into a blessing.

In that instant, could I genuinely feel gratitude?

This line of thinking continued with me into Sunday School where we talked about the Plan of Salvation--where did we come from, why are we here, where are we going...

Each present moment is influenced by our understanding of and attitude towards what was and what is to be. To know who we are and where we are going changes the present.

When you meet a new friend, and you imagine the good times you'll have together, the present moment is blessed with the hope for that future. When a friend dies, your present moment is tainted with the sorrow of a future imagined without that friend.

As we embrace opportunities to look forward with a perfect brightness of hope, we gather a collection of todays filled with joy.

And then there's the past...

I know who I am. I know what I have experienced, what I had the strength to overcome before, and I remember the love I have felt. I remember the sting of regret. I remember the pangs of my mistakes. I remember that I got over it. I remember that I have surprised myself before, and I will continue to surprise myself in the future.

I can choose to experience the present in every choice I make. And I make a lot of choices. Should I sit and listen to music, or should I write? Should I go for a walk or eat lotsa chocolate? (Both enjoyable options.) It is in the very act of choosing that we experience the present. 

But really...

In every moment exists memory, agency, and hope.

Today I'm grateful for the memory of dear friends that I especially miss this beautiful Sunday. Aja, Robin, Carl, Ben, Leiza, John, Jyl, and dear Tony.

It feels like no time has passed at all.

The present is blessed with the memories of precious pastimes and promises of our future reunions.

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